Ms. HarmonyComplicated. Creative. Spoiled.

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Why can’t you just be upfront with me about how you feel towards me? Why do you expect that I can read your mind? Why do you keep telling me that a relationship would just get be a distraction for what you really want to do in life, but at the same time you are flirting with me?! Why do you keep telling the you just want a business relationship but you do and say things that are not? I do NOT understand the games you are playing. Just be real with me and tell me what you want. I may not be able to provide anything to do due to some circumstances but letting me know something would help me out.

I’m sorry that you are having a down and out day, and I know I didn’t help with that. My intentions of calling you today was just to share my excitement, but I have seem to do the opposite. I am trying to be here for you but you are making it hard with all of these mixed emotions. I don’t know what to do anymore.

I wanted to be the one you can call anytime and just vent out their problems. I wanted to be there for you but you seem to some how just shoved me away. So what else am I to do but move on?? I don’t know what your feel towards me are and I am too old to be playing these games. So I have found someone that I don’t have to play games with and I like it.

I’m sorry if this hurts but you have led me to do this.

If you don’t know, I am currently in Memphis right now just for a few days. I can here with a friend of mine just to see all of our old friends. So far I have had fun. Yesterday, we surprised a friend of ours at his job. Afterwards, I was invited to go to a Grizzles vs. Bulls game. I’m not a big fan of either team but I figured that it could hurts for me to go. Come to find out Boyz II Men were singing in the half time. I was a little excited about that. I just need to remember this so I can brag to my sister who is a Boyz II Men fan.

Anyways, I was surprised to see that the Grizzles actually beat the Bulls. I know both teams are pretty sorry but I just thought that the Bulls would school them on a thing or two. Guess I was wrong.

Things with me and my ex are going fine. We have been talking non stop since last week. I never thought my ex and I would start talking again. But I hope this time it will last. I have known this man for more than 12 years. It just didn’t work out the first time because of the distance we had, but that is more than likely going to change.

Well let me get off here and do some research on the Chattanooga area.

Ok… first let me apologize for not updating on here. Once again it’s been one crazy month so far. Here is a little rundown:

1. I quit working at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. I just woke up one day and I couldn’t stand the thought of going to work there again because some of the people there are just so annoying and I get tired of dealing with pain in the ass managers. I know that I am more than likely going to deal with managers like that, but the ones there are another breed.

2. Drama with the family (well between my oldest sister and mom). My sister came in town this week to celebrate her one year anniversary with her husband. Well they were staying with my dad which I thought was better than them stay with my mom and me because there is nothing to do at the house. So I guess my mom got a little upset because they whole time they were here my sister rarely came over to hang out or whatever. So my mom takes it upon herself to get on the phone and talk smack about her husband while they both are standing there. How childish! But I do understand where my mom is coming from but she just went about it the wrong way.

3. Working hard on designing things for Young Rai Entertainment. I have been working on these designs non-stop and my eyes hurt as we speak. All I have done so far is work on the myspace site and some brochure. I have to finish making the corporate identity package, and then I need to start on the website. I am not looking forward to that.

4. My ex calls me wanting to get back together and I am considering it. I know you all are probably thinking that I shouldn’t but I don’t think I try and fight the feelings that I have for this man. I have known him for 12 years and it’s not like you can really just shut off your feelings for someone that you have known that long. Well, I know I can’t and I’m not going to. So I am going to see where all this leads to and who knows I might be moving to Atlanta. We shall see.

5. K.O.Graphx is picking up alot. I am really grateful with all the people that have contacted me to do freelance design for them. So I already know I am going to be really busy the next few weeks. Can’t wait.

There is more that has been going on this month but I can barely keeps my eyes open right now. So I am off to bed.

Good Night!

The last few days have been really stressful and super busy. I have decided to thoroughly clean my entire room… inch by inch. I started Wednesday and I just finished. I am really excited about the results. I bought some bed lifts and my bed is extremely high now. I think i might have to get one of the steps people use for their animals just for me to get on my bed.

But anyways, I am just glad that I did this. I have been wanting to do this for some time now and now that I am done with college I feel like I have alot of time on my hands. Well, sometimes.

Sunday, my mom and I are having this HUGE dinner. My sister is going to be in town with her husband celebrating her 1 year anniversary. My mom told my other sister and I to invite someone over and of course I invited someone Let’s just say I can’t wait until Sunday comes.

Well I am going to get off here and relax.

Much has been going on with me the past few days. I have been extremely busy with designing logos, album covers, etc. for Young Rai Entertainment. You can check them out here: www.myspace.com/youngrai

Other than designing I am waiting on a phone call from the interview I did last week. The guy said that he will have an ad in the paper until Wednesday. So hopefully either Wednesday or Thursday I will hear something. I really want this job badly. I will be so bummed out if I didn’t get it.

Anyways, I need to start getting ready for my other job. Have a good day!