I was watching Dr. Phil yesterday and the guests on there were making me mad. I’m not going to tell you what it was about BUT I will post the news article about it:
JENISON, Mich. (WZZM)- A West Michigan couple desperate for children of their own lose a legal battle and the twins they hoped to raise as their own.
Many couples who have trouble conceiving turn to other options, like a surrogate mother, to carry the baby.
That’s what one Jenison couple chose to do, but instead of ending in joy it ended in heartache, in part because Michigan has one of the strictest surrogacy laws that prohibits contracts and favors the surrogate mother who can chose to take back the baby at any time.
Scott and Amy Kehoe can’t help but smile when they talk about their twins. “Ethan was just a jabber and then Bridget was demanding. When she screamed she wanted her way. When she was hungry, she let us know it.”
Even though they had to give them back to their surrogate mother. “I can truly tell you it was worse than a death because at least with a death you can have closure. You don’t have to worry about where they’re at or think about where they are or how they are. And we always have to think about that.”
After Amy and Scott had trouble conceiving through in-vitro fertilization they decided to try a surrogate mother.
Using the embryos from egg and sperm donors, Amy found a surrogate mother near Detroit. “I picked her because she said she was a Christian and I felt like I could trust her then.”
Trust is all parents have in Michigan because it’s against the law in the state to have a contract with a surrogate which means all the rights are with the surrogate. “Because of what the Michigan laws are, they were was always up in the air. I felt that at any point in time she could change her mind and that’s exactly what she did.”
Just two weeks after the Kehoes brought their newborn twins home they got a call from their attorney. “He said that she stopped the adoption procedures,” Amy remembers.
The surrogate mother claims she had concerns about Amy’s mental health. Amy admits she is being treated for an undiagnosed mental disorder.
Two weeks later the Kehoes found themselves living out their greatest fear. “When we went to court that day, the judge said ‘well, she’s the birth mother, you’re not genetically tied, the laws are the law’ and he ruled in favor of her.” And they handed over their children to the surrogate mother who had no biological ties to the babies.
The Kehoes legally protested, without much hope. “We were told by our attorney that we had no chance.”
The heartache and financial burden became too much, so the Kehoes allowed the surrogate mother to keep their children and the family names they gave them. “We couldn’t name another little girl after my grandmother because it wouldn’t be fair to her. She’d always live in that shadow.”
It’s been three months but the nursery is still full of the twins things. It’s too hard to let go of their memory. “Maybe it was our fault for getting into it, but it was just because we cared. We wanted to have children of our own and it’s very painful…very painful.” says Scott.
There are only six states that allow surrogacy contracts; Michigan is not one of them.
The Kehoes have nine frozen embryos left and plan to try in-vitro fertilization again in the spring.
There is so much I could get into about this story but I don’t want my blood pressure to start rising again and giving me a headache. Michigan law is ridiculous and needs to be changed. How dare anyone say that anyone is unfit as a mother(as the surrogate mother stated on Dr. Phil)
Ok.. let me stop. I want to hear from you now!!
